Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Fulltime (SAHM) or part-time mom (FTWM)

5xmom wants to know what would be my choice:fulltime or parttime mom.
Then I became a victim of the same tag bySimon.


~~~Instructions (taken from 5xmom) ~~~Here’s how it works:
1. So easy peasy, if you were given a choice, would you be a SAHM or FTWM? Just provide 3 good reasons.
2. Include your post link to the list below and Finally,
3. Tag other mommies

List:
1. Immomsdaughter prefers to be a SAHM
2. Miche prefers to be a SAHM too.
3. SweetPea is happy being a PTWM
4. AllThingsPurple choose to be a WAHM
5. Dr. Bernard Chan is both Mom and Dad
6. 5xmom wants the best of both worlds.
7. Simon still dreams of being SAHD
Mama23beas is comfortable juggling work and family.

Though a lot of times it is always a tough decision for a mom to made, I believe it all depends on circumstances. As for myself, long before I have kids I know that I would love to have a bunch of them and I just planned ahead.

But before that, I must found something that I’m passionate about, something that I think I would do for a long time. It was not hard for me, during the final year in the uni I decided I wanted to continue doing research, the best place for me to stay is a university. And I also avoided being bonded, just in case suddenly I just feel like dropping everything and stay home. By the way, I have tried staying home with the 3 girls for 2 months, it was not bad at all. The only thing missing that time was high-speed internet access.

Even before having kids, I thought I would not like the idea of having to be away from them 9 hours in a stretch , and that does not include commuting. I would be happy to at least be with them during lunchtime. And I always believe in nature, and breastfeeding is just natural and something that I would definitely do. Long before I know about breastpump, about that breastmilk can be stored in the fridge for days and even months, I planned to have a babysitter near my office so that I can at least nurse my baby during lunch.

That’s what I thought and I worked to get what I dreamed of. And I believe in being true to myself, if I think certain situation does not fit me or I’m not comfortable with, I would try to adjust.
It was a little tough before we moved in our new home, due to the time spent on the road. Now the school and my office are just 5-10 minutes away, the babysitter 10-15. Thanks to having a job with a flexible working time, on normal day after preparing the girls for school and sending the little one to the babysitter, I only can start working at 10 am, by 12.30 I see them again at school and listen to their school tale. I spend 1 ½ hours with them, nursing (and expressing when I need) the two younger ones before returning to work, a lot of times having lunch with them.

By 5.30-6 pm, I see them again. I still manage to cook simple dinners, not everyday though and spend the time with the kids like any mom would in the evening.

Of course there are times when I wonder, by being a working mom, would I be able to raise happy, well-developed kids. Knowing them, I’m sure my kids are well-taken care of by us with the help from the greatest babysitter.

By the way, think I have indicated many times that I have a very supportive hubby whose helps range from following me to my fieldtrips to being the one who clean the kids bottom almost everynight. By the way, if we can afford it, I always love to have hubby as a SAHD;).

I’m just comfortable with the nature of my job. I plan my own schedule for my research, choose my own area to suit me. For trips, my family follows when I have to stay overnight. I had left Bea1 for 5 days to follow a group of American scientists and cavers to Sarawak when she was 1 ½ years old. The trip was wonderful but I would not do that again. The other nights away from me are when I stayed in the hospital after giving birth to her little sisters, and one of the nights was spent with the father.

With the way I do things, think sometimes I can’t even call my job as a career. By the way, I never look at myself as a career woman. My inclination is always towards the family more.
With that, at this moment I’m pretty sure I’d stay as a working mom. Anyway, I refuse to call myself a part-time mom, just for the reason that I’m working.

That's already more than 3 reasons, right. By now, I'm sure you know I tend to get carried away. Now, who are next?

1. Suzette
2.gartblue

7 Comments:

Blogger 5xmom.com said...

Ya, as I feel too. Go with the flow and when the time is right, do what we want.

11:07 PM  
Blogger 5xmom.com said...

I just notice. Wow, two more weeks! How exciting.

11:08 PM  
Blogger Mama22Beas said...

Exciting?... I have butterfly in my tummy (besides the baby;)), I'm nervous, overwhelmed, but excited pun ada juga!

4:37 PM  
Anonymous simon said...

wow, so exciting waiting for new baby! unfortunately for most ppl, having a job means MORE than 9 hours away from the kids. most of the time, not less than 12 hours per day!

7:26 PM  
Blogger WMD: Wife, Mother, Daughter said...

i guess we are in many ways lucky with our kind of job which gives us good flexibility..right?

can't wait to hear about No.4. All the best.

9:22 AM  
Anonymous mrs b said...

you get what you want, I mean you have thought and planned and luck played its part too.

exciting time for all, maybe BEA3 will feel a little bit out, she'll no longer be the baby of the family! But with her sisters around, am sure she'll adapt super fast. Get to bf again, sigh... how nice. Women are sure made to nurture huh? God bless!

3:50 PM  
Blogger Mama22Beas said...

Ya la Simon...I'd been thinking about that, that's why la chose to stay in the uni and bought an apartment nearby.

wmd...yes, I'm sure those in the same "species" knows what I mean;).

mrs b...Bea3 is getting more clingy now, maybe that's just a stage as Bea2 acted that way too just days before Bea3's arrival. Of course, there is a little worry but just pray everybody (not just Bea3;)) will adapt fast.

5:52 PM  

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